Sunday, September 14, 2008

Community Dynamics

OK, so blog. (I find it funny that the spell checker doesn't know blog.) We are in the Waiting doldrums, so it is kinda hard to think of a whole lot to write about. I know readers like regularish (Really, spell check, regularish is OK?) updates, so here goes.
We are trying to look at Waiting in the most positive of lights. OK, it didn't happen today, but each day we are closer to having a baby.
We will see how long that lasts.
Waiting has been a recent topic on one of the adoption list serves. Those of us Waiting are an interesting community. We have so much in common, yet we are all rather selfish. Let's face it, we are in competition with each other. And I think every person or couple who is Waiting, feels their desperation and need is the greatest. Most have already been through so much in their quest for a child. Some seem to become obsessed with comparing who is getting shown to whom, who are the families that are getting picked, how long have these or those people been Waiting? There is so little control (read no control), people need something. It can be a dark place to go to. The place where you start to ask why them and not us? I will admit to going there when someone gets pregnant, but I am doing my best to avoid it with adoptions. This is why I don't call the social worker. This is why I don't want to know how many babies have been placed or to whom. It makes no difference. It doesn't make our chances greater or lesser. When it's our turn, it will be our turn.


Allison said...

I actually heard the NPR thing from your last post. I got yours too BTW and the comment wasn't aimed at you so much (maybe Alex though) but at my family who refuses to come and see us even though it has been over a year since they have seen Grayson and almost 2 since anyone has come to visit. So yes, you and John both get extra credit for roughing it on our futon!

Barbara Batzer said...

waiting teaches many things. Love MOM